The Swayze story isn’t true, his spokesperson put a statement out yesterday to say he was continuing his treatment and the report saying otherwise was false. Way to keep on top of the news as it breaks, Express.
I can’t help but read the plums headline as implying that they’re perfectly aware that the whole superfoods thing is a load of pseudoscientific self-perpetuating arse.
Plums?! Grapes……Apple juice! – Why don’t they save on reporting these fruits individually and just recommend once that we all consume fruit salad and have done with it!
What happened the last time the DE estimated that Swayze would die within weeks? He somehow completly recovered and went on to star in a new movie, meaning that their estimations were a lie. So I’ll be willing to bet the exact same thing will happen this time.
Raise duty on fuel? Surely not to bring it into line with the price it was twenty years, since when its real cost has dramatically reduced whilst alternatives have spiralled upwards? That would be great.
I actually watched Alan Partridge’s dire show today. He did nothing for me, but most hilarious was Kelvin MacKenzie who said that those who use file sharing sites are “thugs and theives who should all be banged up and the government needs to go after their parents as well.” He clearly has a) no idea of the scale of file sharing, as nearly everyone with broadband internet would be in prison. b) no idea of how the internet works, as policing a system like that would be next to impossible c) no common sense about the real issues that the government have to deal with. Loss of music revenues is hardly the most significant thing in Britian today is it?
Kelvin McKenzie – what do you expect from the man who brought us the famous Sun headlines about the sinking of the Belgrano and the Hillsborough disaster.
The fact that someone like him can rise to any position of influence at all and even now still get a gig where his opinion is canvassed and carries any weight whatsoever is something I find utterly incredulous, unless you come to the extremely depressing but probably almost entirely accurate conclusion that the majority of people in this country are utter fuckwits.
Once voted a rival to George Clooney as the sexiest man on television, housewives’ favourite Alan Titchmarsh is melting hearts off-screen too.
A waxwork model of the gardening pin-up has been kissed and caressed so much by fans at London’s Madame Tussauds that the museum has had to take the statue away for cleaning.
According to web-based encyclopedia Wikipedia, Titchmarsh’s wax figure is “one of the most fondled” at the museum after Hollywood actor Brad Pitt’s. “Oh, yes, Alan gets kissed so often that we regularly take his head off for a clean,” confirmed a spokeswoman for the museum.
Meanwhile the Empress’s sister paper, the Daily Star, has been hit with a big libel payment after wrongly alleging a girl was a member of the gang that killed Rhys Jones. Let’s hope that all these libel payments will bankrupt the Express group and lead to its demise.
Meanwhile the Express’s sister paper, the Daily Star, has been hit with a big libel payment after wrongly alleging a girl was a member of the gang that killed Rhys Jones. Let’s hope that all these libel payments will bankrupt the Express group and lead to its demise.
Just wait until the collapse in the value of the pound feeds through. Oh how they’ll sob.
This is presumably the Express noticing that the rise in duty planned for last Autumn wasn’t cancelled, just deferred. So not really news.
The Express forecast that Swayze would be dead within 2 months and that was year ago.
The Swayze story isn’t true, his spokesperson put a statement out yesterday to say he was continuing his treatment and the report saying otherwise was false. Way to keep on top of the news as it breaks, Express.
Alan’s looking pretty smug about his plums.
I can’t help but read the plums headline as implying that they’re perfectly aware that the whole superfoods thing is a load of pseudoscientific self-perpetuating arse.
Plums?! Grapes……Apple juice! – Why don’t they save on reporting these fruits individually and just recommend once that we all consume fruit salad and have done with it!
I feel another Express Crusade coming our way!
Petrol prices have been cut by a quarter or more, yet the Express is still moaning about it?! Soon they’ll want the government to give it out free!
The Express won’t be happy until every food in existence is hailed as a ’superfood’
Coming soon – “Lard – The new superfood”
Why can’t we live in a world where we pay no taxes at all and get everything handed to us on a plate?
Like the extremely rich.
What happened the last time the DE estimated that Swayze would die within weeks? He somehow completly recovered and went on to star in a new movie, meaning that their estimations were a lie. So I’ll be willing to bet the exact same thing will happen this time.
MatthewS-Even then, they’ll find something to compain about and attack the government for!
Swayze stops his cancer treatment and says ‘get a load of this pair of tits express readers.’
Dammit, this stick is really shoddy, and the moon isn’t nearly as big as I expected it to be.
@aljardi
You mean, say, about 5 portions a day?
Andy H – Oh yeah! – I think we might have hit on something here!!!!
FULL HOUSE!
They’ve actually managed to write bullshit in all four of their front page stories. Bravo!
Plums are not a ‘new’ superfood, Titchmarsh is not catnip to women, Petrol is not currently a rip-off and Swayze has not stopped treatment.
Raise duty on fuel? Surely not to bring it into line with the price it was twenty years, since when its real cost has dramatically reduced whilst alternatives have spiralled upwards? That would be great.
Cancer: check, quack nutrition: check, petrol prices:check, playground gossip:check.
I actually watched Alan Partridge’s dire show today. He did nothing for me, but most hilarious was Kelvin MacKenzie who said that those who use file sharing sites are “thugs and theives who should all be banged up and the government needs to go after their parents as well.” He clearly has a) no idea of the scale of file sharing, as nearly everyone with broadband internet would be in prison. b) no idea of how the internet works, as policing a system like that would be next to impossible c) no common sense about the real issues that the government have to deal with. Loss of music revenues is hardly the most significant thing in Britian today is it?
Kelvin McKenzie – what do you expect from the man who brought us the famous Sun headlines about the sinking of the Belgrano and the Hillsborough disaster.
The fact that someone like him can rise to any position of influence at all and even now still get a gig where his opinion is canvassed and carries any weight whatsoever is something I find utterly incredulous, unless you come to the extremely depressing but probably almost entirely accurate conclusion that the majority of people in this country are utter fuckwits.
….By not using your car as much?
No, that would be taking responsability. Stupid me
From the Titchmarsh article:
Once voted a rival to George Clooney as the sexiest man on television, housewives’ favourite Alan Titchmarsh is melting hearts off-screen too.
A waxwork model of the gardening pin-up has been kissed and caressed so much by fans at London’s Madame Tussauds that the museum has had to take the statue away for cleaning.
According to web-based encyclopedia Wikipedia, Titchmarsh’s wax figure is “one of the most fondled” at the museum after Hollywood actor Brad Pitt’s. “Oh, yes, Alan gets kissed so often that we regularly take his head off for a clean,” confirmed a spokeswoman for the museum.
Ewwwww!!!
Meanwhile the Empress’s sister paper, the Daily Star, has been hit with a big libel payment after wrongly alleging a girl was a member of the gang that killed Rhys Jones. Let’s hope that all these libel payments will bankrupt the Express group and lead to its demise.
Meanwhile the Express’s sister paper, the Daily Star, has been hit with a big libel payment after wrongly alleging a girl was a member of the gang that killed Rhys Jones. Let’s hope that all these libel payments will bankrupt the Express group and lead to its demise.
Sorry about the double post. Could we have an edit option please? I didn’t mean to write “Empress”, blame it on my spell checker!
Wishful thinking I’m afraid DBC; it’s just the cost of doing business to them.