No Tulisa, this WASN'T a victory for girl power
More victim-blaming, anti-woman crap.
When Tulisa appeared on the steps of the Royal Courts of Justice wearing a megawatt smile and a minuscule pair of shorts, it was — she assured us — to celebrate the ultimate victory for girl power.
Perhaps she ought to have worn a girdle. And is that really what she assured us?
Hand on hip and with newly-dyed blonde hair, Tulisa’s advice to young girls who might find themselves in her position was: ‘Take it and use it as an experience to make you stronger, and don’t let anyone ruin you as a person inside.’ In other words, don’t get mad, get even.
It wasn't "don't get made, get even". It was: don't let yourself be shamed into silence. That's far from "the ultimate victory" — it doesn't change the fact that the tape was made public.
Well, how about ‘don’t do it at all’?
Note: this is not addressed to the ex-boyfriend. But as we all know, it's naïve to expect a man to respect his girlfriend or ask for her consent. It's naïve to argue that other men should refuse to watch the tape on the basis that it is stolen property. It's not men's fault, they can't help it: [insert some bollocks about being 'hard-wired' here]. A woman is responsible for protecting herself from shame, and if that means forgoing the thrill of exhibitionism, the pleasure of any kind of non-procreative sex, then that's a price worth paying. This is old-fashioned puritanism.
For what has never been in doubt is that Tulisa agreed to be filmed in a pornographic style in the first place. While that in no way excuses the disgusting and reprehensible way her boyfriend exploited the results, it does, alas, make her naive and foolish in the extreme.
Hundreds of thousands of couples get a kick out of filming themselves having sex "in a pornographic style". (What the fuck does that mean? Shit background music? Dialogue in Swedish?)
What a golden opportunity it would have been, therefore, for the star to send a strong message to young girls everywhere that in our digital world, it is reckless and dangerous to allow yourself to be filmed by a boyfriend in any kind of intimate pose.
See, Platell is an equal opportunity pessimist. She thinks as little of men as she does of women. Men don't want real intimacy, they just want to fuck us over. Don't expect them to keep their word or give too much credence to the idea of consent. Men are incapable of behaving responsibly, so let's not even try to get them to do so. All that's left for us is to keep our legs closed:
Isn’t that the true lesson of this case?
Instead of claiming it as a victory for girl power, Tulisa could have empowered girls to do the one thing that will protect them from such appalling exploitation. To just say no.
And most humiliated girls don’t have Tulisa’s wealth to take a low-life boyfriend to court, nor a PR team to help clean up her image.
So a woman who has oral sex is dirty? Being seen to have sex is "humiliating"? Some fine slut-shaming there.
The cunts in this case are the ex-boyfriend, plus anyone who watched the video knowing that Tulisa hadn't consented to its being made public. They're the only
ones who should be ashamed.