'They saw everything!': Anne Hathaway left 'devastated' after she's embarrassingly pictured without underwear
It famously happened to Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and Paris Hilton, but now usually demure Anne Hathaway has also been caught stepping out of a car without underwear on.
I've banged on about weaselly passive verbs before.
And 'famously'? If you're a sidebar hack, perhaps.
In what is already being dubbed as 'Full Hathaway gate'…
By no-one. Okay, by one snarky dweeb on twitter.
Stepping out of her car and onto the red carpet, paparazzi's caught a full glimpse of Anne
That's a quick double 'stepping out', although it arguably describes a real action here, rather than being DM shorthand for 'exists'.
They didn't catch a 'full glimpse of Anne', unless Anne is no more and no less than her vagina. Which, sadly, for Daily Mail Reporter, I think she might be.
Indecent exposure: Anne Hathaway was pictured awkwardly getting out of her car at the New York premiere of Les Misérables, and she exposed her lack of underwear (not pictured)
Legions of disappointed Mail readers cry into their coffee.
How come Hathaway is the one accused of indecency, rather than the paparazzi's (sic)?
The usually sophisticated actress was clearly embarrassed by the wardrobe malfunction, which was largely due to the thigh high split of her black figure-hugging dress falling open as she got out of the car by swinging both her legs onto the pavement, flashing her lady parts in the process.
How awful for a 'sophisticated', 'demure' woman like Anne Hathaway to have a vagina. No wonder she's ashamed.
Anne, 30, was overheard telling Vanity Fair writer Ingrid Sischy at a luncheon the following day about the 'devastation' of the mishap.
Passive verb klaxon.
Save me from myself! Anne holds onto co-star Hugh Jackman as she attends another event the day after 'the incident'
More projected shame. This time in DM Reporter's fantasy our abased heroine demands protection from a big strong man.
Since the unfortunate mishap, which is out of character for the usually demure and pulled together Anne, many fashion editors have offered words of advice on how to avoid showing off too much flesh.
The director of the Etiquette School of New York, Patricia Fitzpatrick, advised: 'Knees together girls! When you’re sitting, you sit with your knees touching.'
Yeah! Curl yourself up; look as small and self-conscious as possible. Wear your fear and discomfort like a badge of honour. Be a woman!
Do "many fashion editors" have advice for the paparazzi? Or for the leering neanderthals who choose to run this kind of story?