And then there are those who happily tuck into their kebab or curry without a thought as to what went into it.

I don't have a problem with drawing a more or less arbitrary line somewhere on what you will or will not eat. What bothers me is a) lecturing other people about it, and b) denying that one's own choices are cultural, too (veal but not dog?).

I've heard kosher rules cited as proof that Judaism is backward, trivial, prehistoric, etc.

I'm quite happy to eat cheap, cruelly raised meat but I don't agree with halal or kosher meat. Mistreating an animal to save money is fine but mistreating an animal because you haven't had the sense to stop using a 2000 year old guide book, which might have had a use at one point, isn't.

As Andy McDandy pointed out, this has nothing whatsoever to do with animal welfare or food production standards. After all, these are people who will quite happily advocate bombing Muslim countries to dust so it's just too much of a stretch that they suddenly become all smooshie when it comes to goats and chickens.

No. This is thinly veiled racism and they actually think that rational human beings are too stupid to see it exactly for what it is.

I also don't buy this argument that Sikhs and Hindus are fine in their eyes; they're just not quite as bad as Muslims and they certainly wouldn't want them moving in next door, either.

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Brigate di Transizione

I do so love the arguments about "Halal" meat, especially when it comes from the people who fail to understand that it is not "Halal", but rather, the method used to terminate that is labelled as halal. The word, halal, means "Lawful" and there is an equal and opposite word, haraam, which means "Unlawful". The method used to slaughter the creature is called dhabihah. And what I always find so utterly entertaining - and also so incredibly narrowly middle-England of the Mail - is the fact that at no point whatsoever do the Mail explain just what makes something "Halal". Do we all know what makes a butchered fucking cow or chicken halal? No? It's a swift, deep cut to the animals neck, severing the carotid arteries and the jugular veins with particular care taken to ensure that the animal's spinal column remains intact. Do we know how, say, Gordon Ramsay likes to slaughter a turkey? No?




One aspect of dhabihah that has to be done in compliance with Islamic law and tradition and to guarantee the food is halal is that the animal's suffering is mitigated and that it is done with compassion. I don't see that happening with a turkey hauled out, carried upside down, clipped into position and then zapped with electricity to stun it, and to facilitate the processes used to end it's life. How would you feel if you were dangled upside down and then had a rod rammed down your throat to stun you into compliance? Pretty fucking terrified, I bet. But then, your average Mail reader doesn't care to think about where their chicken, turkey, beef or pork has come from, do they? They probably think that the stun gun or the bolt to the head kills the animal straight away, don't they? They all think that the beef merrily leaps from the cow and into the grinder and then into that lovely white plastic tray to be wrapped in plastic. Are they upset about the fact that unlike in the "Civilised" West, Islamic law doesn't actually permit any form of stunning? Of course. We're clean, it's those filthy brown folk who do the revolting stuff. Ever seen the video of the slaughterhouse in the States where a man walks up and down a line of cattle administering the gun with the bolt to stun and render the animal unconscious?

But then, halal's not an English word and thus it's ripe for condemnation. Bravo, Mail, you pile of shit stirrers.

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You couldn't make it up...that's what Littledick's for!

Thanks Kreuzberger. That was the point I was trying to get across - the revulsion demonstrated regarding animal slaughter methods has nothing to do with the process involved - it's because it has an Arabic - and therefore Muslim - name. Their reasoning goes 'it's Muslim, therefore it's nasty'.

It can be seen elsewhere. Suggest shoplifters and muggers should be beaten to within an inch of their lives or have hands severed and you'll be applauded for speaking the plain truth and common sense. Suggest all the above as part of Sharia law and you'll be hounded out. Complain about the sexual objectification of women and the reliance of advertisers on scantily-clad ladies, and you'll receive a Won't Someone Think of the Children Medal. Do so when in possession of a certain skin tone or religious belief, and it's suddenly the God-given right of every Engishman to gawp at tits.

In a way, it's a Godwin-style argument. "Muslims do that, therefore it's wrong". And it ought to be treated with the same contempt that people falling into the Godwin trap get.

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Ten seconds... the pain begins.

Fifteen seconds... you can't breathe.

Twenty seconds... you give up and turn off the Jeremy Vine show.

I would just love it if Paxman or whoever were to interview Nick Griffin or Tommy Robinson or whoever, and ask them, "So, let's say you get rid of all the extremist Muslims. Who's next?".

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Ten seconds... the pain begins.

Fifteen seconds... you can't breathe.

Twenty seconds... you give up and turn off the Jeremy Vine show.

If you want to fuck with a Mailites head, ask them to list all the words they can think of that start with "al". Chances are you'll get them rattling off alcohol or alchemy and algebra. And then you can say to them "but those words are Arabic" and then further play with their minds by pointing out that something, such as the cheap wine they pour into more expensive bottles, that they enjoy comes from those goddamned filthy Muslims.

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You couldn't make it up...that's what Littledick's for!

I swear they think they'll catch Muzzi-itis from halal meat.

I came up with Al-Jolson..
But then I'm no mailite.

Alderaan?

Alopecia?

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I'm a nasty, violent lefty. You cunt.

Are you sure you're in the right place?

Irony. Read the whole sentence.

Alderaan, from the Arabic, al-dhira`ain, meaning "the two forepaws", or "the two forearms". It was the name originally used for what we know now as Alpha and Beta Canis Minoris (or Procyon and Gomeisa) and Alpha and Beta Geminorum (Castor and Pollux). A shitload of stars have Arabic names - apparently most have Arabic names with the rest being Greek or Latin, or just given anonymous registry numbers. Some of those names, incidentally, are really beautiful - Arrakis, Gienah, Altair, Nihal. Imagine the utter blind fury of the Mail if they ran *that* as a story!

Okay, you got me on the alopecia. That's from the classical Greek, meaning to lose hair from one's head.

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You couldn't make it up...that's what Littledick's for!