Mr Mordon wrote:
The fact is many people do judge potential mates on a basis of physical attractiveness, a re-surfacing of our ancient animal instincts. Its not something that is going to go away easily.
But Hooters' waitresses are not potential mates. They are women paid a small wage so that the customer can get a hard-on while his beer is served. What gives him the right to expect that, other than the fact that he's male and rich enough to afford it?
The thing is inequality isn't as straight forward as "men are always dominating women". Have you seen a recent TV advert break? It's almost exclusively men being shown up or put down by women. That's half the problem for me, neither sex can be said to have it entirely its own way
I agree that inequality isn't straightforward. Squeezing human beings into banal stereotypes according to their genitalia does nobody any good. Adverts are, by their nature, some of the worst offenders: in your example, the woman often ends up using the product being advertised, reinforcing the cliché that women are 'hardwired' to perform boring domestic tasks, while her feckless imbecile of a husband sits on his arse watching 'footie'. (She loves him all the same!) I also think the nauseating stereotype of the feisty, 'kick-ass' woman is alienating for men: after all, a 'kick-ass' man is just a cunt.
More seriously, in the reporting of crime and violence, there's the white woman syndrome, where victims only get mourned if they are pretty, young, white and female. I recently read an article which extended this to Lady Di and Jade Goody: death is only tragic or noble if it's female. By extension, men are disposable, despite making up a large majority of the casualties of war, murder victims, fatalities from accidents at work and so on.
So, yes, inequality isn't straightforward. But the scales are still tipped against women. That will only change when men acknowledge the privileges they have, and agree to do something about them. It's already happening in many areas — housework and childcare, for example. My dad did fuck all of either, even when my mother went back to work. His generation didn't see that as a problem. I do.
but it seems to me as a man that sometimes I'm expected to change things without seeing any tangible benefits for myself. This is one example.
Well, in a sense, you're right. The benefits aren't always tangible or immediate (though when my parents eventually separated, my dad had to pay for housekeeping). But you could say the same for plenty of learned behaviours. The main benefit I can see in men who listen, understand, genuinely give a shit, are open to a different viewpoint and able to empathise with it, will take responsibility for their actions, are willing to share the load, and don't feel threatened by the idea of women as their equals, is that they are basically sex on legs. That's arguably not a benefit at all, but it holds for other women too, including some really hot ones.