For all other Mail-related topics
Britain basks in warmest winter for four years... And it's going to hotter as temperatures hit 18C on Tuesday ... z1naj8LcOi
At which point does the DM say...My Goodness how wrong we were when we predicted Arctic temperatures and a horrendous winter?

- sheila jones, london uk, 27/2/2012 11:26
Click to rate Rating 21

Two months after heart op, Iron Duke's cracking the whip again! Prince Philip takes the reigns as he goes carriage driving ... z1o0GxnwgG
Or is it a crap pun?
Jailed: The pregnant woman who cried rape after one night stand forgot her name when she bumped into him a few days later

Read more: ... z1oZgvQpIR

There is an enormous affect on probable convictions in genuine complaints.

Bet there isn't.
#206524 ... ba4d954287
Here Come The Girls

I stumbled upon Kay Burley's blog. It was about women's rights. This seemed so bizarre as to suck me in. The long and short of it is that Kay Burley has nothing to say but she does have an enormous following of comical cretins.

Ooh Kay , what are talking about , my former boss was women and my current boss is a women and i always say im not lucky , and both of them sent the company to hell , i always used to encorage women incloding my wife , but i started to rethink about it . One day men will turn around to fight for their rights , and i hope i will be dead .

For no obvious reason this has brought to mind a memory of being in the car park of a B&Q, around 18 years ago. I don't think I was there to buy anything but was passing time. I think it is some sort of defensive strategy. Faced with this level of stupid and needing to go to bed I've dredged up the dullest moment of my life to smother this.
Traffic warden gives sleeping driver a parking ticket after watching him ‘rest his eyes’ for six minutes

A man was issued a parking ticket as he grabbed slept in his car because the warden claiming council rules stopped her from tapping on the window to wake him up. ... z1ozEoWPwx

Not even close to being legible English. Christ. If you had an infinite number of DM reporters and gave them an infinite number of typewriters, they'd still not be able to write anything halfway decent.
Don't mess with me: The Duchess of Cornwall gives a hore a piece of her mind during a visit to The King's Troop Royal Horse Artillery in Woolwich

Do anything for a sugarlump she will.

Read more: ... z1p9xfqdgz
I see in a headline today that an Australian has become a "Japanese artisan".

Perhaps "courtesan" is the word they were looking for.
#208626 ... l#comments
'I wan go job but I no well': Pidgin English among 165 languages translated (at taxpayers expense) to help jobless claim dole

It was always going to happen in a story about pidgin english.

They shouldn't be here in the first place and we should certainly not be paying for translaters. Learn the language before you come or stay at home.

- commentator, Derby, 18/3/2012 17:59

For god's sake if they can not read write or talk English then they have no rights to any benifitsin this country. When will they stop squandering taxpayers money like this

- Mr peed off, England a once great country, 18/3/2012 17:57

Some commas wouldn't hurt and the 'great' in Great Britain indicates which of the British Isles you are referring to (i.e. the biggest one) and is not a value judgment. You ignorant cock.

I thought there was a requirement that one knew a local to the UK language before being granted a visa? And if they can't understand English, how do they realistically expect to get a job (or is that the point...they don't)?

- Derek, Dundee, Scotland, 18/3/2012 17:39

What the fuck is a local to the UK language? Does Derek mean native English speakers?
Is this Britain's safest (and most pointless) zebra crossing? It's inches away from a wall in a dead-end road where there's no traffic

Read more: ... z1pgQueVrZ

The pointless crossing is just inches away from a brick wall - far too close for any traffic to get anywhere near it without having to reverse backwards.

It would be very dangerous for me if I had to reverse forwards.
- roadhog, uk, 20/3/2012 9:48

I don't know about the world's most pointless zebra crossing - this must certainly be the world's most pointless article.
- Kirstie, Plymouth, 20/3/2012 8:55 195

EIGHT photos of the same zebra crossing, from varying angles? Now that is a waste of time!
- CJ, Birmingham, England, 20/3/2012 13:27

Oh, and the usual comments moaning about jobsworth council workers, despite the fact it's on a university campus.
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