[Paul]

There's a bloke in an anorak somewhere collecting all the pre-2015 placky bags.

I do have a mint condition 1981 Buzby the Telephone Bird bag that's got to be worth a fiver.

Talking about me ? I have two of these.

[Daley Mayle]

I designed a Welsh version of that. Whatever happened to Busbi?

[Bones McCoy]

I designed a Welsh version of that. Whatever happened to Busbi?

I believe he was outsourced to a low wage economy, and perished in a nasty factory gasleak.

[Killer Whale]

I shot the fucker with an airgun near Llandovery.

[Big Arnold]

A birdbrained idea? Outrage as academics are handed £2m to study how humans interact with CHICKENS
The Taxpayer's Alliance has branded the three year study 'ridiculous' and a 'waste of money'

'Given the limited budget and important challenges facing the UK, research like this should be way down the pecking order for taxpayer funded grants.'

We've already learned that the Taxpayer's Alliance has a sense of humour. Money well spent.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/ ... z2fMqWWtTy" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[new puritan]

Repugnant cunts. None of these bubble-dwelling fuckers have done a proper day's work in their lives.

Moments after his speech ended shadowy business lobbyists the Taxpayers' Alliance, which commissioned the report that formed the blueprint for Mr Osborne's scheme, celebrated the announcement at their fringe event dubbed Work For The Dole: The Next Steps For Welfare Reform.

The "work for the dole" report's author - wealthy property developer Chris Philp, a 2010 Conservative candidate for Hampstead and Kilburn - gloated: "I'm delighted that Mr Osborne has adopted my proposals hook, line and sinker - or should I say lock, stock and barrel.

"He must have been feverishly copying and pasting it ahead of his speech."

Taxpayers' Alliance director Matthew Sinclair could barely contain his delight, pouring heavy praise on the Chancellor and exclaiming that these were "extremely exciting times."

http://morningstaronline.co.uk/a-1754-H ... kriGtKsh8E" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

This is why the Tories and their mates are scum.

[new puritan]

More madness from the Tax Dodgers.

http://www.taxpayersalliance.com/201waystosavemoney.pdf" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Point 11 is a personal favourite.

For those children who remain in care, where possible send them to boarding
schools. A Policy Exchange paper, A Better Start in Life, said that the Government
should issue some guidance with criteria of the type of children that should be
prioritised and hold local authorities to account where such children are not being
given this opportunity.

The general gist of the document seems to be 'scrap elections and sell everything to our mates'. Par for the course I suppose.

They also seem to be under the impression that there are still council-run public lavs. Bless.

Old fashioned public lavatories can sometimes represent pretty poor value for
money in terms of the cost of maintenance in relation to how often they are used.
Often the buildings can be valuable capital assets. A better arrangement may be to
pay pubs a small fee for agreeing to allow non-drinkers to use their loos free of
charge.

I'll leave the rest of you to check out point 70 for yourselves.

[Esqui]

We actually do point 70 in a few paces already! But the whole thing is absolutely brilliantly shit. The few good ideas are sorely outweighed by those which are politically motivated

A bit of true colour shining through on 88:

Cease funding racially separate interest groups

Cor, makes it sound like the council are giving Al-Qaeda money, doesn't it? But, no, it means they want to stop funding that day centre for elderly Jewish people - they'll be fine at home on their own anyway, won't they? And no more money for that after-school club to help Eastern European kids perfect their English skills. Should've learnt before they came over, eh?

Also 93:

Charge for teaching other councils how to set up specialist services. For instance if you have a CCTV control room whose manager has the relevant qualifications, there could be substantial revenue in him or her running occasional courses in how to operate it.

Waiting for "Don't pay other councils for experise. See if they will help you for free, or do it yourself".

102:

Check the list of those outside bodies being given free or subsidised office space by the council. They could well be in buildings which could be sold

Yeah, kick that kid's pre-school out!

106 Cease employing Work Experience Coordinators.
107 Scrap all "nanny state" posts. "Five a Day" officers, etc.

Work experience co-ordinators are quite important. There are plenty of kids who may not have the skill or the confidence to contact people for work experience. Should they be left on the scrapheap? TPA offers no reason for this. Also "nanny state" posts is vague and politically motivated. Do they have any figures for the number of '5-a-day officers'? Or is that something the Mail made up that they've read?

Review council-owned car parks with a view to selling them.

Destroy your town centre by privatising car parks and charging people double to park!

Scrap "Equalities Impact Assessments."

Because we don't care about the gays and you shouldn't either

Use of telecare to provide more independence to older people.

"Next week, Gladys, instead of coming round and helping you dress yourself, I'm going to give you a phone call. OK? What's that? Oh, you'll probably just have to stay in your nightclothes all day"

Cease spending money installing road humps.

Drivers always obey the speed limit, it's fine...

Stop producing leaflets for silly reasons

Says you..

[new puritan]

I liked the bit about charging public sector workers to use workplace car parks. Can't see that having a detrimental impact on employer-employee relations or anything.

[youngian]

That list is a mixture of phd in the bleedin obvious, a beermat brainstorming session in the pub and Viz Top Tips.

[The Weeping Angel]

Cattle and sheep could probably think up a better report than this crap

[youngian]

http://metro.co.uk/2013/09/25/taxpayers ... s-4113431/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Taxpayers are to foot a £1million legal bill so George Osborne can go into battle with Brussels to defend bankers’ mega-bonuses.

The public will have to pay for £700-an-hour lawyers to argue in court that the people widely blamed for wrecking the economy should hang on to their multi-million pound payouts.

No quote from the Taxpayers Alliance of course.

[Andy McDandy]

It's 'Don't eat toast' all over, isn't it?

I should explain - there's an article in the Mary Whitehouse Experience spin-off book from about 1991, which featured a list of 'things to do to save energy' found in an old school book the team used as a prop in a sketch. Among the gems were 'Don't eat toast', and 'Learn to play musical instruments rather than listen to the radio'.

On the matter of charging council employees to park for work, this came up in a recent suggestion list for our next round of spending cuts. Our chief executive said that it came up every time, and was always knocked back. Not just from employees but from councillors, who rather liked their free parking.

[The Weeping Angel]

Perhaps the TPA could practice what it preaches

Perhaps they ought to show it to all those rich donors, so they can take the hint and get the TPA to maybe merge with the IEA, CPS, ASI and Policy Exchange to form one gigantic Astroturf dustbin. But this is another case of “Do as we say, not as we do”.

http://zelo-street.blogspot.co.uk/2013/ ... lshit.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[moonkatt]

I liked the bit about charging public sector workers to use workplace car parks. Can't see that having a detrimental impact on employer-employee relations or anything.

Funny that. Our carparks are ran by a private company who we pay monthly out of our wages. Guess we deserve it because we're nasty leeches in the public sector wasting their taxes treating the ill.