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By mr angry manchester
Membership Days Posts
#161494
I know that conspiracy theories are associated with nutters, but, hell, Ive got a few and Im going to share them...

1, The media is a tool of controlling the herd. This is based on my interpretation of the division of society, which is as follows:

A, The Illuminati/the capitalist and political elite who control and own us. They control and run the country and democracy is essentially a sham, the political system exists to keep the status quo.

B, The entertainers of the herd. This is where the media comes in. The entertainers of the herd are employed by A above to keep the population distracted and entertained so that they will not know or carte about the fact that the ruling elite shit on them from a great height

C, The herd. Form about 80% of the population, they do all the work and have to be kept docile, B above do this, they provide The X Factor, Celebrity Big Brother, Heat Magazine etc

There are two sub categories of the Herd, The Awkward Squad, people who have the wit and intelligence to realise what is going on but have no power to do anything about it (posters on here are in this category) but we do like to tap into the culture of the herd to amuse ourselves. The other group is the Masturbating Masses, they are the extremeist end of the Herd, if you spend much of your time in front of your computer with your trousers round your ankles, you wont be taking to the streets will you?

D, The untermensch. Looters, persistent criminals, drug dealers etc. They cant be managed, but there are not enough of them to be a threat so they are largely ignored

2, The tories wanted to lose the 1992 election. By the time Thatcher was kicked out, in 1990, an election was'nt far off and they knew that the shit was going to hit the fan. If they had given the leadership to someone they saw as a potential long term leader, it would reflect badly, and they knew the ERM fiasco was going to hit. Answer, let Labour have one term, they will be hit with the fall out from their fuck ups, it will reinforce the image that Labour are bad with the economy. They will lose the following election and the tories will then be back in. Lets give the leadership to this idiot John Major so we can ditch him after the 1992 defeat.

The plan backfired and the Tories were in for another 5 years without a clue what to do so they deliberately sabotaged things just to leave a mess for Labour, rail privatisation for example

3, The money trick. The capitalist class control the economy. They give the workers a loan, ie ther wages, but they get it back, as the workers have to spend it at other capitalist controlled outlets, ie Tescos for example. The public sector upsets this plan so the capitalist right want to abolish it

4, Scare stories. An offshoot of herd management, you have to create something that the masses can be controlled by, we had 40 odd years of anti Soviet propaganda during the cold war, this has now been replaced by climate change. Its bollocks. Climate change is a natural phenomenon, but it is a great conspiracy, theres something in it for everybody, politicians like it because they can use it as an excuse for increasing taxes and oppressive legislation, capitalist business like it because it is an excuse to sell supposedly environmentally friendly products we dont need (seriously tackling waste, a green idea which I ilke, would involve interfering with the consumer society, if washing machines etc lasted 40 years no one would keep buying new ones) and, finally, the rent a gob chattering classes like it as it has given them something to obsess about now that nuclear weapons are no longer a live issue. Also, it has spawned an industry of "experts" who have to go off on junkets to discuss it, so the fiction has to be kept going otherwise they would be out of jobs. Funny too, how "the problem is always even worse than we thought" isnt it?

Rant over
 
By lord_kobel
Membership Days Membership Days Posts
#161504
mr angry manchester wrote:A, The Illuminati
Yeah, you don't need an actual group like this to exist for it to be true anyway. Using it will make everything else you say seem even more crazy...
mr angry manchester wrote:this has now been replaced by climate change. Its bollocks.
Yeah, no. You're wrong....
 
By Bones McCoy
Membership Days Membership Days Posts
#161517
Interesting, but I disagree on #4.
There's a lot of establishment against action on climate change (See the columnists on everybody's favourite bogpaper).

I believe the new enemy is a lot closer to home.
And let's face it, the enemy within is the best kind for leaders with an authoritarian bent.

The new enemy is: Muslims (Exceprt during riots when it's looters and underclass).
Muslims alone won't do, so we need to provide Al Quaeda with a few fellow travellers. Who include: (Draws deep breath)...

Scientists, Single Mums, Asylum Seekers, Comprehensive Schools, Nurses with Degrees, Academics, Poles, Rumanians, Gypsies,
Students, Girls with better exams than Boys, Boys with worse exams than girls, scroungers, fat women, the BBC, Scots, Arabs,
Councils, Paedos, Primary Schools without male teachers, Men who want to work with kids, Footballers, Gays, The Disabled,
The Olympics, SI Units, Speed cameras, Cyclists, The Welsh, Obvious Lesbians, Social Workers and the Liberal Elite.
 
By crabcakes_windermere
Membership Days Membership Days Posts
#161675
If you want conspiracy theories, you really need to have Freesat. Then, on one of the ultra-obscure public access channels that show random hours of country and western and caravan shows, you get at least a daily dose of this guy:

http://www.richplanet.net/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Literally *everything* is a cover-up. UFOs. 9/11. Politics (ALL politics). He's so seriously deluded, he'd see a conspiracy in a cup of tea.
 
By oboogie
Membership Days Posts
#161745
Bones McCoy wrote:
dailyheil wrote:and which conspiracy is he part of?
The conspiracy to discredit conspiracy theorists. (Do keep up at the back).
I heard that the conspiracy to discredit conspiracy theorists was a black op by Mossad/CIA/MCC
 
By crabcakes_windermere
Membership Days Membership Days Posts
#161807
mr angry manchester wrote:I
4, Scare stories. An offshoot of herd management, you have to create something that the masses can be controlled by, we had 40 odd years of anti Soviet propaganda during the cold war, this has now been replaced by climate change. Its bollocks.
No it isn't - the idea that it's bollocks all created by some pan-global green conglomerate is a right-wing conspiracy theory, but despite what the Dellingpoles and Moncktons of the world would have you think the scientific evidence for man-made climate change is robust, of excellent quality, and ever increasing. And just to underline a point - man-made climate change can and is happening alongside natural climate change. It's not all one or the other.
By Fantod
Membership Days Membership Days
#161825
mr angry manchester wrote: A, The Illuminati/the capitalist and political elite who control and own us. They control and run the country and democracy is essentially a sham, the political system exists to keep the status quo.
Original Bavarian flavour Illuminati, or the postmodern version?
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