[Watchman]

Do we think Billy lurks on Mailwatch?

That thought made my heart beat just a little bit faster!

[Oblomov]

About 30 years ago, I taught myself to play a rather obscure Billy Bragg B side called "Quebec, Ontario and Me". It's opening riff and instrumental passage bear some similarity to Beethoven's Ode To Joy (seriously, Beethoven should sue Bragg). As a consequence, I ended up working out a version of the whole of Ode To Joy and including a segment of it in my version of the Bragg song. To this day it remains the only classical piece I've ever bothered to learn.

Any Brexiter celebrations round my way will be met with me, in the garden, amp on heavy distortion and turned up to 11 playing the European Fucking Anthem.

Badly.

Until my fingers bleed.

Well there's a thing now...

Boo lefty sell out, saying we should tax the rich more whilst he lives in a rural country manor etc...

[Andy McDandy]

Mansion! Pah! I make my calls for the common ownership of all property from a palace carved from a single piece of jade, while feasting on venison profiteroles, stuffed with swan - on the moon!!!

[Samanfur]

The moon? How nouveau riche!

Everyone knows that anyone with real money buiids on Mars. And installs sharks. With laser beams on their heads.

Genetically modified, Martian sharks.

[Andy McDandy]

Sharks? Sharks?

I use a force of trained hummingbirds to spread messages of social justice and universal basic income. I don't even train them myself - my man gets Bill Oddie to do it.

[Samanfur]

I'm so worried about my man getting overworked that I pay for a man for him.

[The Rationalist]

I love the smell of cigars but am concerned around the associated health risk. However, my appetite for risk is such that I would consider employing someone to stand around me smoking cigars on my behalf.

[davidjay]

Billy Bragg could park his diamond-studded Bentley in the gold-plated garage of his hundred-bed mansion and he'd still have done more for this country than Richard fucking Littlejohn.

[Watchman]

Pah! You lot think you're real Yorkshire men!