[Big Arnold]

That won't be meagre compared to my estate.

[Andy McDandy]

Winner versus Littlejohn. He fell out of favour at that point.

[davidjay]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... e#comments" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Except that the police don't mention yuman rites at all.

[Messianic Trees]

German green man heads here: Hat-wearing version could be introduced after study finds pedestrians react quicker when they see it

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... z2cQex6ENt" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Guess what? There's absolutely no mention of any change being proposed, only a suggestion by the researchers who carried out the study that:

These findings should alert EU decision-makers set to homogenise crosswalk lights throughout Europe and offer insight into the effectiveness of other signage, like emergency exits.

That's quite enough for the Mailtards though:

More EU rubbish......Will we have regional hats such as cloth caps for up north and bowlers for London ?
- Stickybob, Croydon. UK, 19/8/2013 4:58

The EU ist very grateful fur dis research. Ve vill be rekommending it schnell to all our member-states.
- C. Featherstonehaugh, UKIP, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 6:52

Oh Pleeeeeeese do me a favour... What is this with the EU. The cost is going to be huge changing all the traffic lights . Its not as if the Brits will take any notice anyway the light turns green you walk across end of. We are not thick we know what the green light means We dont need a stupid figure of a man in a silly hat goose stepping to tell us.
- wind in the willows, Southampton, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 10:07

Surprised the Germans aren't demanding the image of a storm trooper in a coal scuttle helmet.
- dissenter, carrickfergus, 19/8/2013 9:59

Oi!!! Europe leave us alone please, why do we put up with all this enforced reduction in self government, its only a free trade organisation after all, good job Ted Heath is dead as he would be on trial now for selling us short.
- Gordon, Romford, 19/8/2013 9:06

No Bosch crossing symbols needed here thank you!
- Spitfire, Kent, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 14:53

Thankfully, there's still one person with common sense out there:

Yet again DM readers show they should not be trusted to switch on a kettle, let alone vote in an election. Not one of the armchair ranters and ravers have looked properly at the 'substance' of this non-story. Read properly: 'Now researchers from the Jacobs University in Bremen say the traffic light figure should be the model for all of Europe.'. In other words, it is the opinion of a few. Cue the snarling.
- Ay, LS, 19/8/2013 9:18

[canus insanus]

NO THANK YOU, we are about to remember how many of our people the Germans killed in two world wars. Notice I did not say celebrate. None of those people gave their lives in the hope that, through persistence Germany could "über alles" over Europe. There is nothing wrong with the signage we already have, green walk, red dont, how difficult is it. I do not want to become a European, I am British. Germany can keep its signs, we do, Pounds and ounces, feet and inches and Pounds not Euros. Stop trying to bury British history you EU loving idiots.

- Smujsmith , Pig-atop-the-hill, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 18:45

Wow. Staggering isolationism, bigotry, condescension, archaism and little Englandry all in one spittle-flecked, ranting post. Smujsmith needs to take a chill pill and catch up with the 1970s.

[Abernathy]

Not to mention being wrong and getting hold of completely the wrong end of the stick.

When you see something like this, where even the hint of a sniff of something that isn't happening and for which there are no plans can trigger feverish bile-filled frothing xenophobia, you realise just how effective Dacre's Drip has been. And what fuck-witted shit-for-brains arseholes read Mail Online.

[ACG]

No Bosch crossing symbols needed here thank you!
- Spitfire, Kent, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 14:53

I'd quite like Bosch crossing signs: Naked man with giant strawberry for a head = Walk. Pair of ears with a knife in the middle = Don't walk.

[canus insanus]

No Bosch crossing symbols needed here thank you!
- Spitfire, Kent, United Kingdom, 19/8/2013 14:53

I'd quite like Bosch crossing signs: Naked man with giant strawberry for a head = Walk. Pair of ears with a knife in the middle = Don't walk.

Bravo! Good tenuous link there, I like that!

[Messianic Trees]

Is this Britain's first ice bucket challenge death? Teenager drowns in quarry 'after tombstoning as part of internet craze'

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... z3BPvmkMqw" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

An 18-year-old has died after allegedly tombstoning into a disused quarry in a new take on the 'ice bucket challenge'.

[Agnes]

Besides the discontinuity of pouring a bucket of iced water over your head and jumping into a big lake full of non-iced water, it isn't a new take on anything - people used to do it in Peterhead and Fraserburgh harbours all the time when I was growing up round there. Although I never knew there was a name for it apart from "being a fucking idiot."

[croissantfever]

Is this Britain's first ice bucket challenge death? Teenager drowns in quarry 'after tombstoning as part of internet craze'

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... z3BPvmkMqw" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

An 18-year-old has died after allegedly tombstoning into a disused quarry in a new take on the 'ice bucket challenge'.

New take? Hate to be all 'I did the ice bucket challenge before it was famous', but in April, something similar to this was big in Scandinavia. The deal was, you nominated your friends, then jumped, ran, fell or swam into the sea or a lake. Which in April can be pretty damn cold up here in more Northen climes.

So really he was taking it back to it's roots.

[Agnes]

Was this to raise money for charity, or just for the sake of it? (I was under the impression that the important thing in re the ice-bucket challenge was the sponsor money rather than the freezing-cold water aspect of it.)

[Andy McDandy]

Search engine optimisation. Tombstoning has been a regular feature in summer 'bloody kids' stories for the last few years, so is a bit old hat (and some readers may have noticed the usual discrepancy in coverage - namely that kids doing it is terrible, but if a pensioner does it, it's something to be celebrated). Ice bucketing is new, so might get some more hits, for what is essentially 'Guy drowns in flooded quarry'.

[Esqui]

From the express: http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/523235 ... igy-burned" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Jeremy Clarkson to be burned at stakes during world-famous Guy Fawkes party

And then it turns out it's an effigy of him.

[Big Arnold]

And possibly not even an effigy, just the favourite if you bet with William Hill. I don't think any bonfire announce the effigy in advance.