[Bones McCoy]

Even Trump can think up amusing nicknames. They’re delivering bad news and there’s two of them; Morecambe and Wise of gloom, Laurel and Hardy of misery. I know what to use

The Two Ronnies of Doom

The Cannon and Ball of the Apocalypse, (Too soon???)

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... -Kent.html

Dickie makes the same jokes everyone else has been making for 2 days, before deciding that it's all the fault of the evil EU.

Then something about women being softies, a hackneyed old joke, and some bollocks about Johnson.

£280,000 a year? Really?

[youngian]

Predictably, our goodwill has not been reciprocated by 'our neighbours'.

So goodwill is the card the UK has been holding. LJ like all Brexit windbag pundits are stuck up the Brexit shitty pants cul-de-sac. Being chased by a giant Dougal dog made from turds.

[mr angry manchester]

£280000 a year for spouting utter shite?

I do it every day, for free!

[youngian]

£280000 a year for spouting utter shite?

I do it every day, for free!

Littlejohn’s fans don’t because they can’t so they turn to this great journalistic talent to echo their limited sad little thoughts.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... rties.html

Another rant about snoopers and draconian restrictions. Pity he says that it's an unholy alliance of government, civil service and the caahncil, when in the last 24 hours you've had city mayors among others saying that the current system is an absolute mess. Johnson gets a free pass though - it's the evil advisors (but crucially not that one) advising him, boo hiss!

Well, actually, it's not all that. He takes up about half his column to muse on sex and to regale us with a blow by blow account of a Minder episode that is tangentially related to the news.

[The Red Arrow]

Would that be the one where a poorly Arfur drives to Barnard Castle with a boot full of dodgy PPE gear while Terry gets caught humping a Russian violinist in the toilet at the Winchester club as Dave the bar steward can't work out why German car owners aren't queueing up to use his car park?

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... orbyn.html

Rules are confusing, plus Strickly's coming back, so here's a long description of a scene in a sitcom of yesteryear where 2 men danced.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... leave.html

Lefty lawyers and hastily inserted caveats ahoy. Cunt.

[youngian]

Brings out the top guns to bolster his gibbering

As the Tory MP Andrew Bridgen observes:

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... ician.html

In a rare stopped clock moment, Dickie explains how the government careers advice system is crap (and seems to be little more than a basic psychometric test), and how he's bloody useless at anything other than what he does.

Still a cunt, mind.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... tiers.html

In which Dickie is not happy at all. Beginning to set his sights on the PM, and I wonder if the "bucket of shit" moment is approaching.

[youngian]

Over my years in journalism, I've had to distil complicated court cases into 800 words and translate impenetrable company reports into English in time for the afternoon edition.

What do you want a cookie? A tabloid or local paper news editor wouldn’t run a court report with over 500 words in it.
I’ve never read an impenetrable company report and I’ve read many. They’re written in lay person’s language so even Digby Jones can understand them.

[Andy McDandy]

This is a guy who feels the need to explain the rules of Pointless every time he references it. He means simplify it to the point a Sun reader gets it.

[Andy McDandy]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/arti ... pdown.html

A confused rant about London and the perils of putting one of them in charge.