- Tue Aug 18, 2020 5:48 pm
We might have had this already, but what the actual fuck is this thing with TV ads that have a fucking insipid, wafty, whiney, cover version, usually by some spotty adolescent twat that thinks he/she has talent, of a decent original song.
John Lewis is usually the worst culprit with its wanky Xmas commercial, but there's one running just now that's enough to give you the heebie jeebies. It's some bloke and presumably his female partner bimbling around in fucking jim-jams or something, accompanied by the shittest, wankiest, most insipid, whining, floaty, and unsuitable version of a great song you've ever been unlucky enough to hear. The song in question is The Proclaimers' rousing foot-stomper, (I wanna be) 500 Miles. But sung by what sounds like a fucking asthmatic seven year old with a throat infection. In a wanky, pseudo-posh accent from somewhere in England, not the original full-throated Edinburgh growl of the original.
And the product being advertised with this travesty? Viagra. Give me fucking strength.
"The opportunity to serve our country. That is all we ask." John Smith, Leader of the Labour Party, 10 May 1994.